Today, I am 18 months sober by the grace of God.
Here is what it looked like 18 months ago. After a pretty terrible run with drugs and alcohol, I came to the realization, once again, that I have zero control. I am in the truest sense of the word powerless. I can remember being on lunch break at the job I had somehow not lost by then, and I picked up my phone and called my Dad, telling him I needed help. I then proceeded to head back to work, where I talked with one of my best friends Billy. If it weren’t for those two conversations I do not know if I would be here. To this day I don’t know why I made the decision to reach out for help, but I am beyond grateful to God for facilitating that for me. I was absolutely, 100% miserable once again, and had been up for 4 days at that point. My Dad ended up flying into town to help get me back into treatment. I will never forget that night. I kept him up the whole night. Still makes me cringe. I remember having to order alcohol with my breakfast on the morning of the 7th, having to stop at a liquor store on the way to treatment to make it through the 5-hour car ride, and then having to stop again, half a mile from the treatment center to grab a few more shots. Although I had many previous experiences with relapse before this, I felt like this was going to be the end for me if I didn’t get help. Hopefully that paints a pretty clear picture of where I was at.
What it looks like today is very, very different. I have a relationship with God, I have an amazing relationship with my family, a beautiful and selfless girlfriend, a new business, and a host of friends that I can rely on for anything. I would not change one thing in my life. Today, I no longer rely on externals to make me happy. I am no longer under the delusion that money makes me happy. I can bring God into my thought life, I am able to have lasting relationships, I am able to enjoy the small things in life, I am able to show up for people in times of need. The list is endless. I also have the ability today to help other struggling addicts and alcoholics. True recovery is possible, and I am now an example of that. It is my duty to share the solution with others, and that is what I intend on doing for the rest of my life.
Frank S – Austin, TX